Calling out the guards. Unsung heroes all.

You will have seen the scenario many times. Our hero needs to break in somewhere and rescue someone or something from a very bad person who is keeping it. The reasons are obviously malicious and their nefarious scheme must be thwarted. The bad guy/girl is usually holed up in a castle/empty volcano/massive spaceship that is impregnable but with guile and trickier the hero has got in all that stand between them and the prize they seek is the hundreds of employees the Evil Genius has employed to look after everything. I am talking about the humble, faithful guards.

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When you think about it, being the stories antagonist’s guards is an ok job for most of the time. Sure it’s a lot of standing around and looking menacing, especially if you get to the heady heights of throne room duty where you may get to grab the hero, but after a few hours surely most of the day is yours. You get a nice uniform, black is slimming and stylish on anyone, and a gun. There must be a training package or some kind of brainwashing indoctrination to sit through but otherwise its 3 square miles a day. Also there might be a position of some importance if the Bosses plan to take over the world succeeds.

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Where do they get these people from? It’s not as if you see adverts in the paper or online. “Wanted. Henchmen needed for an up and coming Tyrant. No experience necessary as a full training programme is available. No qualifications, save for blind obedience, required”. I took the step of asking my Dad where they came from once and he gave me the best answer of “I expect they recruit from homeless people the unemployed or they attract the disaffected elements in society. They give hope to the hopeless’ ‘.

The only time you need to worry is when the hero does make an attempt to stop your Bosses plan. There is a very good chance that you’ll be asked to finally use that gun you were given and despite the fact there are loads of your fellow guards to back you up the story writers are on the “good guys” side. It’s a pretty good bet that you’re going to be shot, blown up, made to look like a fool when they escape and then ultimately find your place of work in ruins come the stories end. That we make for an interesting story on the universal credit claim you’ll need to make as you’re unemployed again.

We’ve had a bit of fun here but if you do need the services of a Close protection London based company, such as you can be sure to have the protection that your business or you as an individual need.



Author: Kei Taylor

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