Among the various reasons for wanting to forget a person, the disappointment of love stands out. Here’s how to get over the breakup of a relationship and move forward stronger than before.
It happens to anyone: at the end of a relationship, it seems impossible for us to go back to life. Everywhere we look, we see that person: in the objects of the house, in the streets of the city and even closing our eyes and listening to our favorite song. Lovesickness hurts as much as physical pain does. However, just like the latter, this type of suffering also has a cure.
It is not a simple or immediate therapy, but with time and with a lot of patience, it will have its effects. In fact, to stop thinking and forget a person, which can be an ex or a guy you are infatuated with and who turned out to be an impossible love, you have to follow some steps that help you first in processing the pain and, later, in taking back your life and moving forward in the best way.
How to forget a person?
We know that all this is frightening, but in order to smile again, you need to remove his presence and his memory of him, at least for the first few months. Only in this way will you be able to start a new phase of your existence. If your relationship has just ended, all you want to do is stay indoors and cry right now. Don’t worry. It’s more than normal. Not everyone knows, but the crying helps to “throw out” the emotions that have accumulated inside us and has many benefits :
1. Deal with the pain
Try not to turn it into anger at the person you are trying to forget because your focus must remain on how you feel and your feelings. Another way to express them is to write them in a journal: writing down all the swirl and turmoil of sensations you perceive can be very useful because you can read them and see them clearly with your own eyes.
In this first phase, pamper yourself. Indulge in eating a tub of ice cream sitting on the sofa or doing an intense shopping session or spending a day in a wellness center. Thinking about yourself and pampering yourself a little is always good. Obviously, don’t go overboard with the various expenses, but take out some whims that make you feel loved and that make you smile. Finally, the best allies for this very difficult moment are your friends: confide in them, throw out everything you feel and accept their advice. Nobody knows you better than a real friend or friend.
2. Remove his memory
When you feel that you are dealing with the pain in the right way, it is time to move on to the next step, which is the most difficult one: to remove from your life the memory of the person who made you suffer. In fact, you will never forget someone if you continue to be surrounded by things and objects that remind you of them or if you go undeterred to the same places where you went together and where you are sure you can find them. First of all, contacts via “electronic” means are absolutely forbidden: avoid writing to him, sending him messages or even e-mails. You don’t have to block this guy on all social networks – he’s not that useful and, above all, not too mature. Try not to check his profile and photos all the time.
Afterward, cut off any physical contact: you cannot forget a person if you risk seeing them always going to the same clubs or the same company of friends. This situation will not last forever, but for the first few months, it is best to avoid any occasion where he can reveal himself with high probability. Finally, if you have mutual friends, don’t pester them with questions about what he is doing or, worse, if he is seeing someone. Pay no more attention to his life than him because only in this way will a definitive detachment be possible.
Especially for “historical” love stories, the objects and material memories collected over the years are many. There is no need to resort to the drastic choice of taking a garbage bag and throwing everything away, but it is better to collect CDs, photos, concert tickets, letters and gifts and put them in a box. You can decide whether to give everything back to your ex or keep it yourself: this situation of pain and suffering will not last forever and maybe, one day, you could open it again and smile with a veil of nostalgia. To the memories lived with this person. However, for the moment, your goal is to forget and not have around the objects and other symbolic things of your love story is a fundamental step.
3. Take care of yourself
After the second step, it’s time to think and focus on yourself, your body and your soul. To forget a man or any other person, you have to put “in the center” who is most important, that is yourself. Maybe you neglected your diet a bit for the first few weeks. Okay, pampering yourself with your favorite foods always raises the mood, but now it’s better to go back to following a healthy diet: fruit, vegetables, cereals. In short, the classic Mediterranean menu is what you need. To feel in harmony with your body, start or return to training: doing sports, in fact, helps not only to stay in shape but also to free your mind.
Finally, give yourself time. You are already making progress, but in any case, the best way to go on like this is to focus on the present, softening the memories of the past and not organizing the future perfectly. Do not immediately look for a new man by your side because, you know, “nail drives out nail” doesn’t work. At the moment, the only one who really matters is and only you.
4. Start something new
It’s time to open up to new things. If you have a routine or activities with the person you are trying to forget, stop them immediately. Instead, start something that is yours alone: it can be an old passion of yours that you have had to put aside over the years or a hobby that you always wanted to start, but you never had the opportunity. Here it is! By breaking out of old patterns, you will make new encounters, and your circle of acquaintances will widen. By making new friends, you will be able to see how many people there are who appreciate you and want to get to know you better.
In the end, a trip is always good: if you have the opportunity, leave with your most trusted friends and spend a few days full of fun and carefree. It will also be a way to thank them for being close to you as soon as your relationship ends.
5. Forgive and be happy again
Finally, the last step involves an analysis of your entire previous relationship. If you have been in love, it is impossible that there have not been some wonderful moments with your ex: from when you met to when he told you the first ” I love you, “from your first time traveling together with the understanding that you had.
If your affair is over, he will surely have hurt you or committed a grave wrong against you. He tries, however, to see the whole situation in a new light and think from another perspective. In the previous months, it is as if you have been reborn: you will always carry the scars of what you have experienced, but you have shown yourself and others that you are capable of moving forward. So why not forgive? Stopping holding a grudge and saying yes to forgiveness is the last step to being completely happy again. The purpose of this “path” was to forget the man who caused your pain, but above all, not to let him deprive you of the opportunity for a new life. Draw the deepest teachings of your relationship and don’t let the rest wear you down. Now you are back yourself, the one you thought you lost: good new start!
Perhaps now you are wondering if it is possible to remain friends with your ex, perhaps the same man who broke your heart, from which you were able to start over. Some celebrities have done it! In fact, these stars first tried to forget their ex-partner but later managed to forgive him and maintain a friendship.
